This is something I really wish everyone was taught in school. Or better yet from a very young age. Since childhood we are told to ‘stop crying’, ‘stop causing a scene’, to be quiet. This is a normal thing to hear an elder say to a child. As we get older, we apologise for being emotional and suppress what we feel within our bodies.
This is so wrong.
This is so unnatural.
I’m here to tell you beauties that it is absolutely 100% okay to not be okay. Not only is it okay, but it is necessary. The thing is when you stop yourself from expressing emotion, it doesn’t disappear, it stays within you. The emotion is stored in your body and will show up in your life in many different ways. Perhaps this will evolve into an illness, perhaps you’ll find yourself acting out repeated behaviour that does not serve you because you have never dealt with the real issue.
We must express our frustrations, hurt and pain in life. If you feel like crying, cry your heart out.
Really feel it.
Be present with what you are feeling, let it be what it wants to be without judgment or commentary, and let it out!
If you’re angry, get mad! Go for a run, write down your frustrations and burn them, go outside and scream.
Whatever it is dear soul, let it out. And then most importantly: let it go. It is necessary for your mental and physical well being.
If you find yourself not feeling okay for a prolonged period of time – that’s okay too.
There is nothing wrong with you.
This is perfectly normal and more people than you realise are experiencing the same thing. You are not broken, you are not crazy, and you are certainly not alone.
We are not educated on how to understand our emotions and thoughts and can get ourselves muddled sometimes. It’s okay and totally normal. You don’t have to figure it out alone, there are people who want to help you.
Facing and feeling your emotions is the bravest thing you can do. It takes real strength. I am always humbled when I meet such amazing people who have been through such darkness and to now see the light that surrounds them. They are the true heroes.
Just because those around you may not understand what is happening to you, does not mean that you are broken.
I know it’s uncomfortable to feel, but be brave. I know you can be. You have an inner reservoir of strength that can handle it.
You are not crumbling, you are reforming. When you think you’ve been defeated, you will rise. So go out there and express your raw, fragile, perfectly imperfect human existence. It is a privilege to do so.
Here are some things I like to do to release emotion and my thoughts, maybe they could work for you too! Play around until you find something that feels right for you.
Getting my thoughts down on paper really feels like a physical release for me. It’s like all the jumbled conversation in my head is out in the open and I can make more sense of it. I can vent my frustrations with honesty in a safe place that doesn’t need to be shared if I don’t want it to be. I may want to come back and reflect on it, or I may want to burn and tear it up and never look at it again. Both are healing.
Surrounding myself in Nature is one of the most soothing things I can do. Moving the energy in my body by taking a walk, inhaling fresh air, surrounding myself with open space and growing trees with only the rustle of the wind and the song of birds to accompany me. It grounds me in the most natural way and reconnects me with myself when my mind has taken over.
3. Talk about it
Yep, this one is pretty simple but can be the most difficult. Talk out your feelings with someone you feel comfortable with. Share with someone who will hold a safe space for you to express yourself and simply listen to you. If you feel you don’t have this person in your life, there are professionals out there who are looking to be there for people just like you. In the past, I have felt I couldn’t express myself properly to loved ones as they were ‘too close for comfort’. They wouldn’t be able to have offered support from an outside, uninvolved perspective. So I went and chatted to a counsellor for a few weeks. Its nothing to be ashamed of and a very healthy thing to do. You don’t have to get to a point of despair before seeking support. Do it now before it gets to that point. Just like you would go to the doctors if you felt something wasn’t quite right; don’t wait until your in agonising pain before trying to fix the problem.
I hope this serves you gorgeous ones. Don’t hesitate to get in contact if you have any feedback, questions or need some support. I am here for you if you need it.
And remember, no matter what today brings you; everything whale be okay.